For lent, I want to try to write more in my blog. Not only do I want to write more about my experience here, but also provide a reflection of what my experiences have meant to me. By writing more, I hope to be able to better process and think about my limited time here as well as help you to get a glimpse into my life here and the lives of the people that I work with. Some of the stories that I share may be that of suffering. There is a lot of suffering. However, the purpose of these posts are not to make you feel pity for them or for you to be grateful for what you have because of what they lack. My goal is to challenge you through my experiences here in South Sudan.
During Ash Wednesday, I saw many posts on Facebook linking to articles about Lent. Some of these articles were a reminder of the practices of Lent which had the rules for fasting. As I was reminded about the rules for fasting (eating one big meal and two smaller meals), I laughed to myself. This is more than I eat on a daily basis here! It is not that the community is not providing us with enough food, but that is just the way things are here. Despite my “less-than-fasting” diet, I still eat much more than the people here. Most people here eat only one meal per day. Even at school, a lot of my students cannot afford the 5 SSP ($1) lunch that the canteen provides. Not only do my students go through the entire day without eating, but they also have to sit in a classroom with 50-70 of their other classmates while it is over 100 degrees outside with no fans or air conditioning. These might sound like impossible conditions, but when there is no other option, it is not so bad.
As I think about it more, I realize that if children were subject to these kinds of conditions in the United States, parents would be outraged, and the school would probably be shut down. I have seen on the news about students or parents outraged by the food the cafeteria gives at lunch, or schools getting shut down when it is hot and the air conditioning breaks down at school. Or I have heard about parents getting angry when their child’s lunch was delayed by 2 hours while my children do not eat anything until they leave school because they cannot afford it. It makes me think, “How could people who were given so much and have so much always be unsatisfied while those that have nothing are grateful?”
We often think that some conditions are impossible to survive. Before I came here, I was positive that I needed air conditioning. I knew that I would suffer here with the heat while having nowhere cold to escape to. I thought that I needed a certain amount of food to be alert and to be “okay.” These norms from the United States that were ingrained into me were all challenged when I came here. Things that I thought were necessary do not end up being necessary at all. Not only can I function in a classroom with no fans or air conditioning in 100+ degree weather, but I hardly even notice it anymore. Some days, I skip lunch and only eat half of a dinner because I know that is what my students go through. Although I might not be at the level as my students. I am challenging myself to experience how my students live.
Although people here hardly eat, they are still extremely grateful for what they have. They are also very thoughtful towards others. Maybe it is because they know what it is like to be hungry,but part of their culture is to welcome in people who are not eating to share in the food. Although it might be my student’s only time to eat lunch that week, they would insist that I eat with them and share in their plate of food. Whenever I pass through the canteen to see how my students are doing, I am greeted with a chorus of all the different groups welcoming me to eat with them. Now, this is not just a polite greeting that they were trained to say, but they really insist that I eat with them. They try to pull up a seat and hand me a spoon so that I can partake in the meal with them. It is part of the their culture to always cook a lot of food when it is available, never eat alone, and to always leave a little left over. This is not so they can save the food until later, This is just in case there is another person that happens to walk by who the family is then able to greet and welcome into their meal. Whenever I go on runs around the village, People will always welcome me into their table to eat with them. Even though they do not eat much, eating is a big part of their culture. It is where they can show hospitality to another person by welcoming to join in. It is amazing how people who have nothing are more easily able to give away what they have. It would be so easy to just be selfish and eat more when you have more food. However, they know what it is like to be hungry, and they do not want others to feel that way. When they have, they are proud to be able to give it away and share with others.
